Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo

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If you let a thousand monkeys fling their feces at a blank wall and then used the result as your screenplay, you could make a better movie than Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo.

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If you simply filmed those thousand monkeys at work, you’d still have a better movie. Even though this film is only 75 minutes long, I feel as though it stole three hours from my life.

People often ask, “If there is a God, why does He allow suffering in the world?” A more relevant question would be, “If there is a God, why does Rob Schneider have a movie career?”

I don't ever wanna see that.

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