I can’t believe we’re paying to see something we get on TV for free! If you ask me, everybody in this theater is a giant sucker!

By this point, with nineteen years worth of episodes under its belt, the need for a feature length version of The Simpsons seems like a dubious proposition at best. If you really need to see ninety minutes of America’s favorite yellow-skinned losers, there are probably at least that many reruns on Fox’s associated networks that you either haven’t seen yet or don’t remember that you’ve seen. I have the same problem with Law and Order repeats on TNT.

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You’ll understand when you meet her, provided we don’t get murdered by pirates first.

This movie wants to be The Princess Bride so bad it almost makes me feel like a heel to break the news. Almost. Unfortunately, this desperately earnest fantasy overstays its welcome and drags on far too long.

Rob Reiner’s fantasy clocked in at a spry 97 minutes while this adaptation of Neil Gaiman’s graphic novel is weighed down by a 127-minute running length. It is not without its charming moments, but this movie lacks the light touch that it needs to be successful.

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